JEWELRY
I love jewelry. I especially adore chunky gold jewelry, the kind that looks like it came from a temple. It doesn’t bother me if folks think wearing bracelets up to my elbows and a ton of necklaces is ostentatious. The Queen of Egypt, ol’ Cleo, pulled it off. She had nothin’ on me.
There’s cheap jewelry and expensive jewelry. Don’t believe anyone who says no one can tell the difference. Just a glance is all I need to determine if a set of pearls came from a mollusk or a plastic mold. And I don’t need a jeweler’s glass to spot a fake diamond. I just need to get close enough to bite it.
People started wearing jewelry at least 500,000 years ago. That is, if you consider bones worn through the nose or other body parts to be jewelry. Jewelry is what separates mankind from the beasts. Adornment is strictly a human affair.
Ever see a lion with earrings? How about a hippo with a tongue stud? There are birds that make gifts of bright rocks to their mates. But unless it has a hole in it and can be strung around the neck, no way it counts.
Expensive jewelry is an investment and confers value to its wearer. That’s why it’s a favorite gift for men to give to women they want to impress. However, some women despise such gifts. They view it as a crude attempt to buy their affections. Well, come on over this way, big boy. I’m for sale.
As a young kid, whenever we went to a store, I pestered Mommy to give me 5 cents. This was so I could buy a trinket from the machines in the lobby. The machines were the old fashioned, gum-ball variety.
They dispensed trinkets and toys as well as gum. It was the luck of the draw as to whether I got plastic jewelry, a toy, or a brightly-hued gum ball. Unless it was the former, I’d throw the item away or give it to my brother, Mark.
When we got older, Mark and I would fight over who got the prize from the box of Cracker Jack® we’d share. The prize was usually a ring. Of course, I wanted it and didn’t care about being fair.
So I resorted to secretly dumping the candied popcorn and peanuts out of the box. I retrieved the prize and replaced the box contents. I’d then act surprised when there was no prize. Mark never got suspicious of all the “defective” boxes.
As I got older, I started to get some serious jewelry. My family gave me a charm bracelet and it’s still my favorite. Its charms symbolize my various interests at the time, like horses and music. It’s too bad they didn’t make a charm for a rich Sugar Daddy. I would have added that to the bracelet, too.
If you're enjoying this over coffee, tea, or whatever, please consider buying me a cup!WAKING UP
Okay, so through excessive sleeping patterns I recognize I’m feeling depressed. Now what? For me that’s a matter of remembering my A-B-C’s: Accept-Breathe-Change. Maybe they’ll work for you too.
The first step is to accept that we’ve slipped into depression. I don’t know about you, but this is not an easy thing for me to admit. As a man, I like to pretend that through my machismo, I’m immune to such things. But the fact is I’m as much human as anyone else. I’m susceptible to all the emotional turmoil every human experiences. Hence, depression is one of them.
There is no shame in admitting we’re human. It’s part of the deal.
The second step is to breathe. I mean this literally. Deep diaphragmatic breathing is a sure fire way to restore emotional balance to the body. It unlocks a mind chained to negativity. Through the pure act of breathing, we can actually feel the tightness gripping us gently release.
My suggestion is to take a long metered inhale through your nose, if possible. If your sinuses are stuffy, then breathe through your mouth. But the key is to inhale slowly and deliberately. Then with lungs full of fresh air, hold it for several seconds. You may feel a pulsing, particularly in your temples. This is simply the tension within trying to unwind. Then when ready, exhale through your mouth — a thoughtful and controlled exhale. Imagine your tension releasing and flowing out with your breath.
Breathing in this manner can easily lead to crying, as you feel anxiety pouring out your body. Go with it. Let the tears fall. I do. Think of them as rivers carrying away the toxic pollution that’s been poisoning your psyche. You may feel different muscles loosen up, too, particularly in the stomach and upper back.
If you find your mind racing too much to concentrate on slow and deliberate breathing, try doing some yoga or aerobic exercise. Yesterday I discussed using these techniques as aids for me to help combat forays into depression. One main benefit is to give the whole body focus while forcing consistent breath-work. They are excellent tools.
The third step in the A-B-C method is change” By this I mean to change your perspective. Abandon whatever paradigm you’re holding onto that’s imprisoning you in depression. This is the hardest step, but after accepting that you’re human enough to slip into depression and after using breathing techniques to release the overwhelming anxiety, change is the next natural thing to do.
Focus on things within your control. If your depression centers on how someone has treated you, realize you cannot change how that person responds to you. The only thing you have control over is how you respond to the person. If it centers on some event, like losing a job, quit lamenting on what’s happened. You have no control over that. But rather put your energy into things within your control — like a job search or learning new skills that can translate into greater opportunities for you.
You’ll feel in-charge when you focus on accomplishing tasks within your control. Once we’re back in-charge, we’re ready to pluck the opportunities which present themselves. But if we’re still wallowing in self-pity, we are blinded to recognizing these opportunities.
So, when suffocating in the stranglehold of depression, go back to the basics. Revisit your A-B-C’s.
If you're enjoying this over coffee, tea, or whatever, please consider buying me a cup!
